A cup of tea... anyone?

I did zero work today. ZERO. OH dead. The weather was too good to just sit at home cracking my head about consolidation shyt.

SO... I went to Westfield Doncaster with mum.

I brought a few bras with my Westfield voucher. Like FINALLY I got to use that card! And used it efficiently too!!!

Treated mum for Japanese food. I would soooo recommend that stall in the food court. It's called "I heart Teppanyaki!". And true enough, its teppanyaki was damn delicious!!! Then I got a Bento Box for my brother.

I saw a silver dress at Forever New and thought maybe I should get it for Thanksgiving but I didn't get it. I'll maybe get it if it later on when they announced the theme.

Masterchef tonight! :)

I will do work tomorrow. Promise.

Ok so this is my testimony...

It goes like this.

On Sunday, I was feeling very sick, bad temperature and feverish with mighty huge headache (not exaggerating here).

I pretty much slept the WHOLE afternoon and night. I've never slept SO MUCH in my life. I drank buckets of water and ate as much oranges as I could. And mum boiled chicken soup for me. But, I still feel very very sick. Just thinking about work tomorrow kills. On the one hand, I feel so sick and want to call it off before its too late, but then I told myself I'll be alright. It's just one of those moments where everything sucks that I just cannot be bothered anymore. Well... this moment is the moment where I put everything with God and trust Him fully.

So... I slept and next morning, I woke up. I still had the usual headache but the fever had gone down considerably. I had breakfast, took two panadols and hop off to work. The first 2 hrs at work was killing. I had the worst headache ever and it was soooo cold even with the heaters on. But then, after talking to some customers, I kinda felt better. I guess the panadol kicked in already. I tell u, panadols are a miracle creation!! And after that, the headache was gone. LIKE COMPLETELY!

And guess what? I survived 9 hrs at work. YUP. NINE HOURS. I dunno how I did it. I was afraid that I would not last 9 hrs but I did!! And all through the 9 hrs I wasn't struggling or pushing myself to hard to get things done. Funny, it was like another normal day at work!! Even mum was surprised that I kept going, she was expecting me to call her up half way to get me home. And after that I even went for the cell BBQ but very tired of course.

Well... God is great isn't it? OH Lord... You give me strength when I most need it. I like how You amazed me. Keep doing it okay?

Consolidation...

Only accountants would understand.

It might as well just read as Condolences.

Even my joke is not funny.

Just thinking about it gives me headache.

*sigh* It's true accounting students lose their souls in uni.

*drum roll*

A pro in stalking...

Officially. I'm getting very good at this.

I am a genius. Sometimes I do wonder if I actually am THAT intelligent. LOL.

P/s: I hate that I get red too much. I dunno why. Suddenly poof red. I dunno why. It's a mystery. It looks like I'm drunk. That's why I hate it. I'm going in circles. I should stop.

God... You amazed me again and again. Over and over again. This is too overwhelmed. But I like every bit of it.

Enight was the most eye-opening thing ever.

Ah... God... You leave me speechless again. I seriously have no words to describe it. Seriously, I cannot find even a word to describe it.

In short, the place was 2/3 full. One person who was sitting outside whom I invited 30 minutes before actually turned up. The actors did great. The dancers were memorising. Pastor Chee spoke the most powerful 20 minutes message.

The night was simply superb.

My friends thought that the play was really awesome! They even suggest that they would pay for it. I was like wow... GOD! WHAT HAVE U DONE? They even said its better than last years.. Well, no offense but improvement is always good!

What touched me the most was several people were responding. Alka responded to the altar call. Believe me, it left me speechless. Before this I prayed for a revelation, that God will do something almighty, that God will be speaking to each one individually. AND GOD DID!

Wow. Nothing but wow. Wow God, You truly are what You are. I'm blown away by it all.

I finally finished an assignment a day before it's scheduled due date, which is very uncommon for me. Surprisingly, it turned out as the "easiest" assignment ever. LOL. The only hard part was the group work but eventually it all worked out. So... praise God!!

OMGsh... fasting FB is torture because I have like important messages on there and I cannot read them. But 2 more days left!!! That means 2 days to enight.

Btw, I managed to invite a few of my friends to come and they said yes!! God... u wow me again and again. Well... I did some convincing with some of them. LOL... my negotiating skills must be improving!! I think I nagged abit with some of my closest friends but its because we've known each other long enough till the point where we're too comfortable with each other.

Honestly, I'm excited but worried at the same time. I don't know how my friends will take it especially with the awkwardness but I know God will work His "magic" on the night!

I accidentally cut my finger again. This time my right index finger so it makes typing and writing difficult. But it will heal. It amazed me everytime when a cut heals itself without me doing anything. lol. I guess I'm easily amused by these things.

Passing by Chaddy....

Me: OH did u go to Chaddy VIP day?
J: Yeah.
Me: OH yeah... (apparently I say OH and YEAH too frequently)
Me: Did u get stuff?
J: Yeah, I spent $70.
Me: On what?
J: Clothing (How very metrosexual...)
Me: Okay.
J: What did u get?
Me: OH I didn't go.
J: What? WHY?
Me: Coz I forgot.
J: U forgot? I tot u would go?
Me: LOL. I don't keep track of these stuff. Besides I'm normally tired after uni.

And then the most demeaning reply from him.
J: BUT UR A GIRL! U're supposed to know all this stuff.

Right... yep. I feel very insulted. VERY.

Getting "abuse" from customers is not cool.

It is that one situation that I cannot speak up for myself. Well... from my point of view (note my view), it wasn't my fault. That customer might just had a bad day. Yet, I feel helpless. I cannot defend myself.

But, business policy = customer is always right. Business students... take note of this golden rule number 1 if u wanna make it big out there. So... I just let her have her 1 minute "moment" with me. Besides, it would be pointless arguing with her coz I would end up losing and might even look like the rude one.

But, I managed to find comfort in all of this and not let it get to my head. How can u not find peace? When the weather is sooo fine today! Thank you Jesus for ur comfort.

But. I got heaps of milk and egg roll. YAY!! This next few days will be full-on milk and egg with NUTELLA!!!!!

YAY!!

Old school Jay... I LOVE! This song... everything. It's quite funny, his old songs are better than now but he looks better now than before. So... it equals each other out. LOL.

Top lyrics.

Holidays... hurry up and come already!!

OMgsh... did u know the primary school students have 3 weeks holidays?? THREE! I know this coz my boss's daughter is in primary school. I would soooo love 3 weeks hols.

Well...

Primary school = 3 weeks hols
Secondary school = 2 weeks hols
Uni = 1 week hols
Work = 0 week hols

Hrmm... sums up the pattern of growing up very very well.

And pooey thing is that Melbourne Uni people already start hols! POO! AND! They have 2 weeks! TWO!!

And we have only 1 week. ONE!

POO indeed.

U are missed!

I went to my FIRST prayer meeting. :)

R u proud of me? Let me hear a YES!!!

I didn't put much thought whether I'm going or not. Well... I just went. I couldn't go to the other usual prayer meetings during the week coz of work and uni schedule clashes with it. So, since I have time and nothing else to do, other than sit in front of the box and stuffed myself, I decided to take this opportunity to go and pray for enight. Get excited people!!!!

After prayer meeting, I went to the Glen to go to the Bank. But, silly me, the bank was closed. wth... Who would have known the Bank would be close on a Saturday? I soooo didn't know that. Yes... and coming from someone majoring in Banking and Finance. Poo! Well... I guess they are "lazier" than their Accounting counterparts.

So.. I ended up walking around the Glen (like a loner). I saw pretty shoes in Nine West. The price is actually not bad. 130 for a pair, that means $65 for 1 shoe. Bargain right?? LOL. Ignore my nuisance. But really, it is worth the money since its Nine West, not some cheap gimic from Target or Kmart.

BUT! Control....... I'll get them once they go on sale. :) See... smart shopper. And I got face scrub from Priceline. :)

I hate group assignments. Gosh... these people don't want to do things properly. They either copy the book, have one or two sentences and that's it. And trying to meet up with them is such a pain. Grr.

And. FM MST went well, happy. Handed in corp law assignment, relief.

Company reporting mini test went so-so. I'm either not 100% sure of the answer or I'm guessing. But. Somehow, I have a good feeling about this.

Oh Lord, please let me passed my cost MST. This would soooo complete my week.

God is good. My phone tells me so. :)

My exam timetable is okay. It's all in a week but its all spaced out abit so that's good unlike last semester.

LOL. This is the first non-emo post since forever.

I keep getting dreams that I'm going out with someone. A guy. We are both happy.

Is God trying to tell me something??


The funny thing is when I wake up I cannot remember who this person is. No matter how hard I try, I cannot recall what he looks like, what he wears, how tall he is.... All I can remember is we walked hand in hand... smiling...

The rest is like a blury view.

U know those days where u are just so upset that u cannot cry? No matter how hard u squint for tears, it doesn't come? Well... this is how I feel now.

I had a bad day at work. It's days like these where I just think to myself WHY am I still in this job.

And then, I come home to nagging parents, an assignment that is now where close to finish and 5 lecture notes to remember, not to mention a test that I haven't even begin studying. T_T.

God! I cannot stand this anymore. I cannot do this anymore. It's too hard. I'm tired. I have alot on my mind. I don't know what's keeping me from quitting. There is nothing I like about the job. NOTHING!! I can just easily tell my boss and get away from all this stress. I want to concentrate on other things, not occupying my mind about these unnecessary/needless things.

Why am I doing this to myself? I just want to go to sleep now and forget about everything. But, how can I when I have alot to do?? God, u talk about perseverance, I have nothing in me, how can I persevere?

Lord, give me strength. One step at a time. Give me strength to keep up.

FM MST on Wednesday. PROGRESS: Still left to go through lecture 7 and sample MST paper.

Corp. law assignment due on Wednesday. PROGRESS: Oh gosh... still left Question 2, which I absolutely don't know what the question is about and my question 1 is still in a mess.

Company reporting mini test on Thursday. PROGRESS: zero. Yup. No joke.

Just thinking about work tmrw kills. I don't want to go. I DON'T! I wanna stay at home and study... I don't want to slave myself for 9 hrs, worrying about all these things.

Just imagine the anxiety... T_T.

It's days like these where I detest work more and have thoughts of quitting in my head. I dunno how I'm going to juggle everything, esp. when I will have alot on my plate next semester.

Oh Lord, please help me.

I'm banned from FB by God. OH. My Restaurant and Rollercoaster park is going to suffer.

U might think cheh, easy easy no problem. BUT! I AM REALLY A FB ADDICT!! There's a tab on mozilla just for FB and its the first one. Every time I see the tab and just had a sudden urge to press it. I even go on FB in the toilet thanks to free FB on 3.

So , its like, when I wake up and the first think I think about is "I need to check my FB". I NEED TO SEE IF THERE'S ANY STATUS CHANGE or I need to check if someone wrote on my wall or I need to check my Restaurant and Rollercoaster Park... etc...

LOL.

Self control is something I need to learn.

It's half way through the semester and I haven't been sick yet. Like feverish sick. It is amazing... truly amazing.... Other than the occasional overnight sniffles and headache, I haven't been really sick for 1 day. Well, spirulina and fish oil supplements have made me stronger.

LOL. We'll see during exams. I get sick ALL THE TIME during exams. Not funny k... OMG, last sem, I went through the worst period where I was very badly ill with spinning headache, sore throat but still went for exams. Like really! okay?? That was like the most depressing time ever.

*shivers*

I don't even know how I managed to still go for exams when I'm half brain dead. God pulled me through...

OH. Multigrain wavy chips!! MUST TRY!!! It is sooo crunchy!!! I wonder why it's wavy shaped tho... not the usual roundish shape that all chips have. BUT! It's sooooo soooooo nice!!!

I am sooo sorry for the previous emo post about LTC. NOW, this is the happy post on LTC. LOL. How Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde!!

It was sooooooo fun!!! We went to Snake Valley, Crystal Lake, somewhere near the Ballarat town. We stopped by Ballarat town and went to Beechworth Bakery which is a well-known bakery. LOL. I know this coz after seeing Beechworth Bakery's secret recipe book at Sars place.

Then, we reached the place. It was near a lake. It had a serene, quiet surrounding. Peaceful indeed. Then, we started our sessions and then had free time. The others played Captain Ball while Aunty Marilyn and I watched. Then, we played "Pumani". It was sooo fun!!!

Sue Ann cooked for us her ultimate roast chicken. We were sooo hungry that all we could hear were other people chomping on their food. All I could see were people "attacking" the chicken. Then, Kaitlyn sang her forfeit song. LOL. Ivie laughed too hysterically that I was afraid she might choke on her food. Then, the guys in Chee Kai's car arrived. So, session2 begins!

Then, it was sleep time. OMG... it was soooo freaking cold. The door of our cabin couldn't shut and we used Ming Huei's bag to keep it shut. It was sooooo cold. The coldest night ever. But I slept alright... surprisingly.

In the morning, Ming Huei told me she heard typewriter noise and I was like geez... I thought I heard like things dropping on the roof. I thought the wild ducks were flapping around the roof area. Then, We had morning devotion. And then session 3, which is an extended version of Jem and Chee Kai's session.

Then, home. Oh... how silent was the car ride home.

So... yes... 2 days in a nut shell.

LTC retreat was awesome. Plain awesome. The only thing was that it was superrrr freezing. OMG... It was pure torture just trying to sleep when ur shivering and trying to warm up using ur own body heat. But, surprisingly, I managed to sleep alright, until my phone alarm went off for morning devotion.

LTC is sooo indescribably. I cannot describe how much up-lifting it was. It's just soooooo awesome.

And now, here I am... Back HERE again. I have SO MUCH to do. It's not funny. Just thinking about it makes me just wanna do nothing. I've said this before and I'm just so through with this. I'm tired. I have to redo this assignment that I don't know how to start and this test where I know I'm going to do badly. GAH. Save me....

When Aunty Marilyn was praying for me, she talked about bandaged scars, spiritual and physical damaged. I agree. Yes, I do have scars that I still kept from the past. Disappointment, disappointment with myself and with God and with everyone else. And then, it just struck me that how am I supposed to lead and be the leader that everyone look up to when I still have so much hurt in me. When I just feel so helpless, so negative... how? can I step up when there's too much going on??

After the session, I had to go away and locked myself up in the cold, squash toilet and prayed to God. I asked God to reveal himself to me. I NEED to know God will do this with me. I know God will do this with me. I know that once He have chosen me, He will walk side by side with me. It's just I need a reassurance. I need Him to tell me, yes... u will lead a flock and I will be with u all the way. That's all I needed to hear.

God, please reveal to me. Give me tentative ears to listen and a open heart to hear You. Lord, I want more of u. I want to give everything.

Lord, U have rescued me and I believe U will continue to do so.

Wednesdays can just disappear all together.

I've had 3 bad Wednesdays in a row. Well, the first one was super emo, 2nd one I felt sick (tummy sick) having a too strong coffee and the 3rd one (which was yesterday), I swear for some reason the public transport seems to dislike me that day. Seriously, I missed like every single bus to and from uni. In the end, dad fetched me home and I reached home at around 7.30.

I'm afraid I'm going to get KILLED by Antoinette and Wen later. Two tutors/lecturers that I am very very afraid off, coz I didn't do any tute work for this week coz I was busy preparing for my MST and presentation for Friday. Ah... I'll just bullshit something if they asked me a question. I can't help it ok?? I'd rather put more time into assessments and ace my test even if it means getting scolded by them.

One hour from each of them. BE PATIENT.